i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Randomize
