After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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