he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Randomize
