I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
