PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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