He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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