I think my vagina is haunted
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
