It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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