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• (630): View more from Illinois

  Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.

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• (760): View more from California

  Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos

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• (626): View more from California

  We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (716): View more from New York

  I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended

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• (903): View more from Texas

  You're a waste of cheezeits

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

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• (954): View more from Florida

  I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  I tried to put my heels in the coat check

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• (240): View more from Maryland

  Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!

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• (813): View more from Florida

  And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit

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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up

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