well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize