Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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