Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Randomize