Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize