**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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