I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
