she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
