a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
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