I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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