nutella sex= disaster
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
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