i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
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