Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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