WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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