Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
