I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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