why didn't you poke me back
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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