I hate your face
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Randomize