I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
