Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
