i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
