ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
