I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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