In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
