we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
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I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
The uberlube is also flammable
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number