dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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