Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
