dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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