Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Randomize
