Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
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