garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
