he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
The adults are the big ones right?
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
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