So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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