I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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