At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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