just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
