So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
The chlamydia really affected his face.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
