oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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