time to smoke my breakfast
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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