just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
