We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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