Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize